Voices for Voices®

How Music Can Heal Your Soul | Episode 182

Founder of Voices for Voices®, Justin Alan Hayes Season 4 Episode 182

How Music Can Heal Your Soul | Episode 182

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Chapter Markers

0:00 Music and Impact on Life

20:22 The Power of Music in Life

Have you ever felt a song speak to the very essence of your soul, turning ordinary moments into cherished memories? Join me, Justin Alan Hayes, as I open my heart to share how music has been the soundtrack of my life and my family's journey. From cozy evenings spent watching "The Voice" with my late Father to emotional moments of exclusion from band practice, music has taught me about resilience and joy. These personal stories reveal the impact of melodies and rhythms that continue to resonate in our lives, offering comfort and inspiration even in the toughest times.

Together, we will journey through unforgettable concerts with loved ones, like the electrifying performances of the Trans-Siberian Orchestra cover band First Snow and the nostalgic sounds of Third Eye Blind and Eve 6. I reflect on how music honored my father's memory during his final farewell, when songs like Carrie Underwood's "How Great Thou Art" struck a poignant chord. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of how music connects us, weaving through the fabric of our lives and binding us to moments that matter. Let these stories inspire you to feel the power of music in your own life.

This episode explores how music acts as a powerful force in our emotional lives, shaping memories and fostering connections. Justin shares personal stories ranging from joyful family moments to challenges with substance abuse, highlighting music's role in both grief and healing.
• The Voice TV show's impact on personal and family dynamics
• Family traditions and shared love for music
• Personal struggles with substance abuse and its backdrop
• Moments from concerts and their emotional weight
• Music's role in grief and honoring lost loved ones
• Calls for listeners to connect with their own musical experiences

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Justin Alan Hayes:

Voices for Voices TV show and podcast. I'm your host, founder and executive Voices for Voices, \Justin Alan Hayes. Thank you for joining us. If you could give us a big thumbs up, subscribe, like, share, comment on this episode and the others in our catalog, we would greatly appreciate it. Thank you. We want to reach that gigantic goal that I have of helping 3 billion people over the course of my lifetime and beyond, and we would be just as static if you could help us with that. Well, we do also have our merch shop up and running a lot of new items. Uh, you've seen me in the last number of episodes of having that new merchandise on me, so you can check that out at voicesforvoices. org forward slash shop and you'll be able to find many different items. Both you can wear notebooks, cups, mugs you have it and again, we are a charity, so we operate off of 100% of donations, sponsorships. Nobody's getting paid on our board. In fact, I've invested just about close to 100% of what you have seen with the organization, as we pivoted from an event only to an organization. So, yeah, we're starting something and we're going to continue on that route. As you know, I'm a doer. In the last 30 days, we have knocked out 16 plus episodes to the world. We started 2025, as you notice, with some authority. So thank you for being a part of Voices for Voices. We're happy to have you with us, whether this is your first episode or whether this at this point over 176 episodes we love you all the all. The same, thank you for viewing, watching, listening. So, yeah, we want to.

Justin Alan Hayes:

In this episode, we want to bring we feel about celebrities, if it's real or not. The show starts out with the chairs being turned around, so an individual comes out and or a group comes out and sings and plays a song. The judges' backs are to the stage and the judges have to hit a button whether they want to have their chairs spin around and have the option to have that individual join their team or they don't, or, if their team is full, then they obviously can't add more members to the team than is laid out in the show. They could also trade down the line team to team, singer for singer, et cetera, etc. But anyways, the the show is called the voice and the individuals. You know they're, they're singing and the only way they get these celebrity judges uh to to select them, uh, and try to fight for that performer to be on their team is by their voice, is by singing, and that was one of my dad's favorite shows.

Justin Alan Hayes:

He watched a lot with my mom. They have conversations their days, some days their days would revolve around the timing of the show. You know what time it would be airing. Sometimes it didn't. They like to do that and make sure to, especially to be around for the playoffs, the future rounds of the show, and so they wanted to be home, or if they were at somebody else's house, they would try to rush home safely, or they would watch the show at whoever's house they were at.

Justin Alan Hayes:

Again, in that show it's called the Voice. There's music involved. So that's a really good setting for us to really wrap up. We previously aired, and are out there, two other episodes around the specifics of music and the individual, the human voice. So we're talking about music and that was a show that was and still is For my mom a show that they liked. My mom still likes it.

Justin Alan Hayes:

My father he has passed, but I'm sure he's watching Down from Heaven, but I'm sure he's watching down from heaven and he's picking who he wants to be on, particular teams or, when it gets towards the end, who's going to win or who's going to get past a particular round of the playoffs, and so that's another way music really kind of came into our lives and as a family. And I would also watch it too when I was, when I was living at home or if I was teaching and it was closer to where my parents resided, reside, and then that would generally be on a Thursday and Thursday would, or Wednesdays and other days of the week, but I distinctly remember Wednesdays and Thursdays at the at the beginning, the show being on those days, and so I'd come home from teaching and the show would be on or it would just be be starting. So it's about the spoken word, the singing, the music behind it, and when we're going to give, get into some of these parts, it is going to be a little bit rough for me. So I mean I'm going to be emotional, as as we've we've seen. So I just wanted to let you know.

Justin Alan Hayes:

But the music, how music really impacts us and still impacts me to this day even just liking to listen to music, to be mowing the yard and have the headphones on and listening to music. Just one example if there's a concert on one of the channels that we have. I'll sometimes listen to a song or two, watch a song or two, and if I have a little bit more time I'll have, many times on in the background as I'm working, a concert of one of my favorite bands, and one of those is Third Eye Blind from the 90s, and they've had a resurgence here the last couple of years. So I'm not going to rehash any of our past episodes. We're going to jump right into when I was in college and early actually, in high school and that was the point when I as I have been lightly mentioned where I, for one of my birthdays, one of my gifts was an electric guitar.

Justin Alan Hayes:

I was in a band for a short period of time. I was taking guitar lessons, we and the band I was in for the short period of time we would play a couple house parties and then I one of the trauma points for me was showing up for band practice and being kind of locked out of the house and not really told that I wasn't in the band anymore, but basically you're not in the band anymore. So that was for me. That was a traumatic time of things I thought were going well and apparently they weren't, and so that was a trauma point.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And then I started to go to, you know, these clubs as a teenager, like the teen clubs, like I talked about the grind that I chatted about, the teeny bobber clubs where you have to be obviously less than 18. And there's particular age ranges you have to be in to even have access to that, to even have access to that. But music was kind of the first draw for me to that because there was music being played, albeit pretty loud, and was at my wife and I, our daughters they had a family dance the other night and I was just reminded on how loud, how loud the music can can be played and in the gym and it really took me back a little bit to kind of, you know, earlier years and maybe that was a little bit of part of the reasons why alcohol and substances really were playing a part in that part of my life was to help maybe drown out some of the loud bumping music. I don't know, I'm just throwing that out there. So yeah, these clubs, they were typically on Fridays and Saturdays. If there were holidays they would add a day, usually around that, maybe an extra day during holidays, and so that was something I would do.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And so when we talk about the substances, the alcohol abuse and that aspect of the club mention, you know at the club that there's music being played and, depending on the type of club, it could be played through the speakers without an actual band playing, or it could be a club where a band would play and there would be instruments played and singing, or it could be strictly instruments. So there's there's a multitude of types of clubs. I'm just giving my experiences uh with uh with the types of clubs. So, yeah, at the at the clubs, you know there there's music uh, and you're dancing to to the music uh, and that's kind of like a little bit of the under underlying part. So while there was that substance abuse and alcohol abuse that was kind of getting kicked off, I still enjoyed going there. You know, talking about the music, it was a place I could listen to some popular music that I had listened to when I wasn't at the particular club, you know, whether I was just hanging out at the house or with some friends or at a house party or some people that I thought were friends at the time. So the music played that way, good or bad.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And then, as I was in college and then even out of college for several years, in college and then even out of college for several years, there were the adult clubs, you know, the first at 18 and over then and then went to 21,. Then you're able to consume alcohol legally at the particular establishment and that was really what my weekend really revolved around. So back to high school and the teen dance club. As my weekend would revolve around that, I may not go to that club both Friday and Saturday. Friday and Saturday, if my mind reminds me, and maybe that they were only open Friday or Saturdays. I'm not really sure, so I won't comment on that because I'm super foggy on what a regular week weekend would look like at that particular type of club. And then that that, as I just mentioned, as I got older in college and out of college, my life to a big extent was revolving around substances, alcohol and clubs and girls. So I think that's what partly led to my seclusion.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And actually seclusion was the name of the first band that I was in, and it was actually at my high school. It was the high school band director. He played the drums, which was super, super cool to do that and we even had a house party at our house on the deck and he came over at his drums and I mean it was, it was awesome to have him. And then a friend to have him, and then a friend that Mark Ruby, that I went to school with, played, played sports with for a period. He was, he was the the singer, I was playing the guitar and then the band director, he was playing the drums. So it was it was cool, but with we just played one with that particular group. We played one time after one of the football home football games, and so we were called Seclusion and so looking back on how I was kind of secluding myself of consuming substances and really kind of getting, I say getting lost in my own mind, but really being hard-nosed about what I did or what I was wasn't doing wasn't popular and in high school wasn't the person getting invited with all the cool groups or the cool cliques of people.

Justin Alan Hayes:

So when I did find a couple of individuals that I started to hang out with, we kind of did our own thing, and so it was for the most part three or four of us that were kind of doing, doing that, doing our thing, I guess, as opposed to, and so we were going to that, that club and and trying to find ways to get alcohol so we could get drunk and do all that stuff, which I'm not entirely proud of, but that was the case. So that was happening and so not only with the substances kind of abusing those frequently, their relationships, taking advantage of people in relationships, taking advantage of people in relationships not being around with as many family or other gatherings that I should have been. I was constantly thinking, okay, because I had really bad acne, I had braces twice, so I have them for the third time now, which they are going to be coming off here soon, so really excited about that. So I wasn't the best in relationships, the way things were, from being a son to nephew to whatever the title would be and it was, as I look back, just not good times. I was just making poor decisions, doing things, trying to live for the moment, trying to think about how I was feeling, not others. So if I wanted to get high or I wanted to get drunk or if I wanted to hang out with this individual and not this other individual, I would do that and I would do things on my own timing and I really just wasn't in a good spot, and that was one of the biggest things I had to come to grips with.

Justin Alan Hayes:

You know 2017, when I was in the hospital. There's so many people I have hurt along the way. I tried to make amends as much as possible, but I've tried and a lot of those have failed miserably. So here I am at 43. If I went to school with you, if I met you out somewhere at some point and I wasn't the kindest to you, you know the clubs, the substances, etc. That you know hit rock bottom in 2017.

Justin Alan Hayes:

Music still was big, but prior to 2017, and this is where I mentioned Third Eye Blind previously they're one of my favorite bands. I was able to meet them, luckily, over the years, got a couple photos with them, and it was at a Third Eye Blind concert that I had one of my biggest panic attacks. They came to Canton, which was the closest to where I was living and my wife, we were living and so it was like this cool thing, we're gonna go see Third Eye Blind. They were close, so we didn't have to travel very far and I had a panic attack, you know, two to three songs in and had to leave and then went back home and then I consumed alcohol and you know I wasn't. I wasn't eating, I wasn't taking care of myself the way I should. I had just a lot of, a lot of things that I had to work through and that's that's kind of where that was at.

Justin Alan Hayes:

So now when I watch concerts or I go to my friend Mr Kittrell Chin, when he plays with it's called First Snow. It's a Trans-Siberian Orchestra cover band. They've been blessed to buy the Trans-Siberian Orchestra to play their music, kind of verbatim. And so when I go to his show I was able to go with my mom and dad two years ago, so I'm real glad that dad was able to go that time. And this past year I went twice. I went once was closer to where my wife and daughter and I and where we live, and then once it was closer to where my mom and dad, and so I asked mom, and so it was neat to be able to take her to a show, her and my dad.

Justin Alan Hayes:

A lot of times one of the gifts that they would get each other would be concert tickets to Maroon 5 or Train or Elton John purchase tickets. You know he would ask me. You know, hey, could you know? I want to take your mom to you know this particular band show and it's tickets are on sale and you can, you, if you help me, you'll get them. And so I know music was, was big, and with my dad, and then with mom and my sister, my daughter, me with my wife and as, uh, as early as being not even 16 years old, harking back to a third eye blind concert, one of the first concerts, my mom, my dad, my sister and myself we went to disney for a couple days, uh, disney world down in florida, and third eye blind was playing at the house of blues which is downtown disney, which I think it's Disney Springs now. Anyways, it was close to where we were staying as a hotel and so we got tickets and I'm still blown away. I think they might have been $13.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And the three bands? It was Third Eye Blind, they were the headliner, eve Six and Our Lady Peace, and nowadays, to have, you know, three bands like that, it would be a lot more. So, at General Mission seats, my sister went with me and we were able to actually get the front row standing and I remember the last song. I mean, I was just mesmerized by the music, by watching the bandmates, band members play their instruments or guitars, the keyboards, the bass, the tambourine, the drums, what have you. And I remember one. It was the last song Third Eye Blind was playing, it was God of Wine. It's the last song on their debut album.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And at the end Stephen Jenkins, the lead singer of Third Eye Blind, he has a tambourine and he starts, you know, playing it towards the, the last third of the song and he was walking around the stage singing, playing the tambourine and there was like a split second where he looked over and made eye contact and he did a couple taps of the tambourine. And here's me like reaching, like I don't know if I was trying to reach for the tambourine or just to get an autograph or what, but it was one of those moments where that that was a big, big moment, just from from a music standpoint. And to this day I remember and that's 30, 30, something uh close to 30 years ago that that that actually happened, uh, and so that might be a part of why they've remained to be one of my, uh, my favorite bands. I I lean more towards their older uh music than what, what, what they? They do now, uh, but that's just, that's just me. So that's the oldies.

Justin Alan Hayes:

I guess now like being 43 and talking about bands that were popular in the 90s and now coming back around these reunion tours or playing their first or their popular, their greatest hit albums, and so that was cool to be able to do that, to be that close, to kind of witness not only the hearing, listening of the music and watching the instruments, but just having that, one of those moments and I can't really describe it, the actual event, but it was one of those moments like the Phil Collins unplugged moment that I had at my mom and dad's house when I was growing up, which led to me having an interest in playing a musical instrument guitar and then I was gifted with a guitar for my birthday. I was able to be in a couple bands, even though those didn't work out. Just to be able to do that and get that experience was just neat. And yeah, so, as we come to a close, one of the things with my dad passing and when individuals pass, if they decide to have a service or not, some people do, some people don't, some families do, some families don't but one of the parts of the calling hour service at the funeral home, they were able to play music over the speakers, and so it's not a huge deal, but there's music being played.

Justin Alan Hayes:

So music kind of from, as I can remember, at my earliest age and then, with, you know, my dad passing, having music being played at the calling hours and his favorite songs, the Carrie Underwood, how Great Thou Art. And as I talk about getting emotional, after my dad had passed, at the house we put how Great Thou Art, carrie Underwood, the version that she sings, carrie Underwood, the version that she sings, and so that was one of the ways we wanted to honor him by playing his favorite song. So it's all emotional People talk about you know, do you really get over it? And it's just going on a year. I don't think I'm ever going to get over it.

Justin Alan Hayes:

And that's okay, we're all human beings and don't let anybody tell you well, you should, you should just be able to get power through this, uh, and so tying that music in to not only the, the calling hours. But then we actually had a mass at church and there was music that was playing there too, and so music is just embedded with us as human beings. That's the goal. That's the reason why I did this episode. You know we're talking about Voices for Voices and one of the ways of sharing a voice is by playing an instrument singing so it definitely feeds right in to who we are as an organization. But I wanted to bring personal experiences and so this now third episode that did on and around music and how powerful it is, just human to human. I thought it was a good time to go over this, and you'll be seeing and hearing some of the songs I'll be playing at a different date on social media. So until next time, be a voice for you or somebody in need.

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